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Dedicated in
memory of:
Lorraine McNeese Boeshore

 

Children and Domestic Violence 

It’s important to remember that children living in a home where their mother is battered are victims of psychological and emotional trauma, whether or not they are directly abused themselves.  Children are aware of the violence against them almost 100% of the time, regardless of their age.  Mothers report young infants showing disturbed eating and sleeping patterns, and being more tense and irritable because of the violence that has occurs.  The stress of domestic violence can cause children to revert to behavior such as:

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thumb-sucking

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nail biting

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bedwetting

Children from violent homes are more likely than other children to have stress-related physical ailments such as headaches, ulcers, and rashers. 

Children from violent homes may have one of two distinct behavior patterns:

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Overly aggressive and difficult to control

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Unusually passive and withdrawn

They may have trouble concentrating in school and on homework, which can lead to poor academic achievement.  In addition, batterers may keep their partners and children isolated from other friends and playmates.  This makes it harder for children to learn appropriate interaction skills. 

Ending the relationship doesn’t always mean the end of the abuse for the mother or the child.  Men who batter often use their children as a weapon against their female partners.  Examples of this are:
threatening to hurt the children if the mother leaves

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threatening to hurt the children if the mother leaves

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telling the children what a terrible mother their partner is

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threatening to take the children and never allowing the mother to see them again

Some of our country’s “missing” children are actually being hidden by their mother from abusive fathers or may have been kidnapped  by batterers in an attempt to get the mother to return to the relationship.  One of the saddest parts of domestic violence is the long-term effects it can have on children who witness it.  A great majority of prison inmates were raised in abusive homes.

Intervene now!!
Before patterns that will last a lifetime have been established.
It is so important...